May 27, 2017
As life goes on, there’s the sense that we enroll in the next phase of our lives as if the whole thing is a regularly scheduled program.
Elementary school (grades 1 -> n) -> high school -> [post-secondary -> graduate school] -> employment/academia, -> Whatever hierarchy your job dangles in your face (analyst -> associate -> senior associate -> principal -> …; junior -> senior -> director …) -> etc.
We take on the socialized assumptions of each phase as the parameters of our behaviour, always enrolling in someone else’s program for our time.
You can’t get what you want if you outsource who you are to what you’re in. Making that mistake, “What are you in?” quickly becomes confining, better put as a prisoner’s greeting: “What are you in for?”
A better question: “What are you in on?” You decide what you’re in on. What does a day look like in your ideal life 20 years from now? What do you care about? What do you want to work on? What are you afraid of, and what are you doing about it? If school/work aren’t taking you there, what are you doing about it - what are you working on outside of them? What’s your side project?
What would your life look like if you could say you were all in? On yourself, on a project, a skillset, whatever.
Blindly enrolling in any phase means taking someone else’s word for what you should do instead of thinking (2024 correction) feeling for yourself.
This all boils down to one question: What do you want?